Comments about the original English work > Drafts Version 3.0.0 and later are licensed under the Creative Commons > Attribution-ShareAlike 1.0 License, with an additional clause that > prohibits one from using my name in order to promote or to imply an > endorsement of a particular printing, publisher, or derivative work > without my express, written permission. Does that mean that I need your permission to advertise you as the original author? About the version we used for chapters 0-4,6, it was from the second draft. We are switching to the 3rd draft now. Chap. 2: 1 circadian for 30 diei or 30 circadians for 1 dies ? Chap. 4: "Working ... contact established" "Cluster Command Mode engaged." Both these phrases are said by the command software. There should be only one phrase for both... ======= Chap. 5: "I have a few more deciCircadians of theoretical work to do" Are these really decicircadians, or rather decacircadians ? Chap 7 ; * beginning : a few hours for 15-20 circadians doesn't really make a speedup factor of 30. * with a speedup of 300, a minut in the real represents 2, not 5 decicircadians Chap 9: * did Kyle really spend the last *decadiei* in the physical ? * "raish" ? * damn rivers? Shouldn't it be "dam"? Chap 10: * The "methodology employed in FBI background checks": employed in Europe since at least the 19th century and exists only since the middle of the *last* (1901-2000) century? Chap 12: * I added a description of Le Petit Jardin after "Whoever came up with the idea for Le Petit Jardin was a genius," * I removed the description of sanctions in "with the power to deny access to the Physical, or conversely, to ban someone from the Community and banish them back to their physical body" * Linus Torvalds is not American, "deported from the United States" sounds weird. I just said "deported" * I don't like all that gratuitous insulting Bill Joy. You're talking about Sun's Chief engineer, right? I too, believe that scientific research should be under democratic control, not sanctified and untouchable (which is another way of saying it's under corporate greed's control). Bill Joy's critic of nano-technology goes well beyond the "improbable grey goo". Aren't there enough Big Evil Corporation leaders or RIAA board members out there to name laws after? If you just bash Bill Joy without exposing a more explicit opinion, it sounds much like you're advocating a quasi-religious view of science (in French, we call it "scientisme") with its lot of stupidities like "don't bother scientists with ethics" or "you can't stop science". * "I'm sure most of Asia would agree with you": I'm currently in China. GNU/Linux may be a long-term tendancy in most of the World, but here it's probably just been a short-lived trend. My guess is, it's the same in Thailand. It may be different in Japan or South-Korea, where market control and IP enforcement mean something; but widespread counterfait usually implies that nobody has an incentive to switch away from Microsoft. Last time I checked, there wasn't a single Debian mirror in PR China. Moreover, to most asian people I've met, "democratic control" or "political activism" mean little. Stallman is definitely not a folk hero among Thailand's mostly rural population. Maybe you'll want to be more precise, or a little more evocative about the events in Asia between today and 2050, or today and Stallman's assassination. Chap 14: * mundane : the last 2 sentences are by the same character. * 500 tons of cathalytic solution per day, shipped by, say, 1-liter toilet chemical bottles, that sounds like an awful lot to me. Wouldn't you rather just have it produce, say, 500 liters/day? Chap 15: * The cubes are composed of a polymer in crystalline form : is it really possible that a polymer also be crystalline? * what does "3 or 4 degrees of separation" mean Chhap 16: * is it really useful to once again tell how Nolen vas punished? It was done chap 12 already. * I am an anti-GM guy, the kind who would readily go out and destroy crops if some were ever planted where I live. I seriously doubt the potential of genetical engineering to actually produce something that would beat organic crops at eg. desert resistance, even (or especially) after 50 years of economic development. While it would seem normal for someone uninformed to utter such things as "Hell, most of the desert crops we eat wouldn't exist without gene splicing" (especially 50 years from now), this book is about politics, not realism. If I were you, I'd have someone else in the assembly reply something like "c'mon, I'm a geneticist, this is all bullshit, everyone knows GM crops' only purpose and achievement has ever been to allow ownership of plant varieties, and ultimately all food production, by the Monsanto-Novartis Corp, with the complicity of the second Bush administration." I hope you won't mind if I do it in the French version, and if I point out that the aging geniticist who were sent to prison all were working in public labs. List of typical errors to look for once the work is translated - le Physique -> le Réel - Noeud -> noeud - Noeud Autonome -> noeud autonome - oe -> \oe, etc. - ponctuation - engramme : feminin - relire les dates. Elles sont à tous les coups presque toutes fausses.